Why Jealousy Becomes Destructive
Jealousy becomes destructive for everyone and it can burn everything to the ground. It kills everything alive and moves as fast as a tsunami. Jealousy is as destructive to us as it is to others. It’s a feeling that can really ruin a life.
We have all been jealous at some point in our lives. Regardless of whether we are jealous of the person’s appearance or what the person has achieved, no one recognizes this feeling.
There is a certain type of jealousy that can be considered healthy. This type does not leave a bitter taste in the mouth. It’s more about a small pat on the back that emphasizes something we want or that we would like to change, and leaves an aftertaste that is more reminiscent of sadness or nostalgia. Healthy jealousy is not as bitter or destructive as the pathological one.
Listening to jealousy so that it can help us
Jealousy, whether it is healthy or destructive, tells us that we are missing something inside, or at least it points out something we do not have. It can show us a sense of inferiority that prevents us from succeeding in establishing healthy relationships. Or maybe it reminds us of a dream that disappeared somewhere along the way.
Regardless of whether the jealousy becomes destructive or whether it is healthy, it always has something to tell us. That is why it is so important that we listen to it.
We will not gain anything by hiding it or denying it. Jealousy is there and wants to tell us something. If it did not, we would not have felt like we had a knife in our chest when others told us about their happiness and success. We had not cared.
When we feel jealous, it is like something is storming inside us. That is why it is so important that we listen to it. We should find out what it wants to tell us, accept it, and do something about it. It is in our hands, not someone else’s. The only person who can decide what to do with a dream that we have not fulfilled is ourselves. This is something we should not forget.
Jealousy becomes destructive if it is pathological
It is true that we can not always fulfill all our dreams, but we may be able to modify them to the current situation and work hard to make them come true. It is therefore normal that we feel that little sting from time to time if we see that someone has achieved something that we ourselves have never succeeded with.
The problem is when jealousy becomes central to our interactions with other people. Then it dominates our relationships and we begin to constantly compare ourselves with others. The only thing this will lead to is that we will not be able to live our own lives.
We focus on external criticism. We look for people’s shortcomings, mistakes and weaknesses. It is a punishing attitude that prevents us from being happy for others.
What comes next? Hatred. Our happiness depends on the misfortunes of others and their happiness means that we feel dissatisfied. And unfortunately, this blinds us when it comes to finding a solution to something that has gone wrong.
To convert negative energy into positive
When it comes to jealousy and everything related, we need to turn that energy (which is focused on criticizing and looking for others’ shortcomings) into something positive. We need to look for what really makes us happy. So we redirect all that energy that we would use to others to be used in our inner world instead.
We can only compare ourselves with ourselves. It is important that we understand that it is pointless to compare ourselves with others. Each person is unique and has their own strengths and weaknesses.
Why bother comparing yourself to others? We are different people, we have not experienced the same things and we do not see the world in the same way…
Each person is structured in their own way. There will be people who are “better or worse” than us regarding certain things and vice versa. We must accept this if we do not want to end up in an endless game of comparisons.
One person may be bad at math, but it can be very easy for another person. But the second person may not be as creative as the first. Every person is special.
It is only by living our own lives that we can focus on what we want to be, and how we want to do it. So as we move forward in life, we do not want to be surrounded by jealousy. We need acceptance so that jealousy does not become destructive. Only then will we be able to lead ourselves in the directions we want to go.
