The Resilient Personality: 4 Defining Traits

Having the resilient personality is more than just being strong. Authentic strength is, after all, not a product of physical strength, but of an indomitable will. A strong person does not know how to give up. They fall nine times and rise ten, they allow themselves to fail and do not stop looking hopefully at the future.

While we have all heard of this type of personality at some point,  it is interesting to know that the concept appeared in the 80’s in social psychology.

Suzanne C. Kobasa, a psychologist at the University of Chicago, wanted to know what was special about certain people. People who not only handled stress better, but also learned from difficult, demanding situations.

The resilient personality was defined at the time as a subtle combination of biological components and the way these people assimilate their experiences in society. However, the focus has changed somewhat since then. 

We could say that it grew and that we can now see a set of characteristics with indisputable potential that we should all develop.

In fact, if there is one thing that the larger companies have begun to value, it is  “mental toughness”. In other words, mental endurance plus a resilient personality.

This is because in our complex and competitive world, it is no longer enough to be brilliant and talented. We must use all our resources to continue to grow in whatever area, scenario or circumstance we choose.

Peter Clough, Professor of Applied Psychology at Manchester Metropolitan University, is a leader in the study of resilient personality and mental endurance. In books such as  “Developing Mental Toughness”  , he offers tools and psychometric tests to evaluate the four dimensions that make up this ability.

We must also remember that no one is born with a resilient personality. None of these mental settings or internal strengths are there from birth. Rather, they are an exceptional result of thoughts, attributions, and attitudes that we must continue to choose based on our experiences. Both successes and, of course, failures.

Confidence, the ability to believe in oneself

Let us admit it,  there is no worse enemy than the one who lives within us. Our self-image is what determines our behavior after all. Therefore, someone who sees himself as small, weak, hurt, and entangled in indecision will seldom achieve anything good or self-fulfilling. The person will also not face difficulties, contradictions or difficulties very well.

As Raplh Waldo Emerson once said: self-confidence is the first step towards success and well-being. We can also say this: our life is our self-esteem.

To be able to trust ourselves and our self-esteem  , we have no choice but to invoke the courage to face our fears. To feed our self-esteem and to ignore our limiting attitudes.

2. Self-control, somewhere between peace and positivity

The resilient personality is not at all characterized by a high capacity for self-control. They have it at an average level where  they realize in all seriousness that they can not control everything. Everything that happens around them or what fate has left for them… they realize that it is beyond their control.

A resilient person knows that a certain part of life is determined by uncertainty. In this declaration of uncertainty, however, there is a refusal to give up. They connect to their own emotions to be able to face what can happen with courage.

In the midst of  every difficulty, it is thus always possible to achieve new goals and learn something new.

Face challenges without fear

Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi once said:  change is a part of life. Absorbing them as best we can is a motivation for our personal growth. 

However, we know that challenges often come with the unwelcome emotional trio of fear, stress and anxiety.

A resilient personality is characterized most of all by a cognitive flexibility and an ability to tolerate ambiguity well. Their inner vision, calm and mature, allows them to see each challenge not as a threat but as a time to gather inner resources to create a positive and effective resistance.

4. Commitment to myself and those around me

The commitment of people with the resilient personality goes beyond themselves and their own gain. A defining feature is their authentic social commitment, their sense of unity and cooperation. This deep desire for altruism and social support often makes them an inspiration to others.

In fact, just their presence and focused and relaxed attitude often significantly lowers the level of stress in their surroundings.

For existential psychologists, a resilient person is an authentic person. Someone who looks to the future with confidence, free from selfishness and driven by a definite desire for the good of all.

In conclusion, we can state that this personality type brings together qualities and internal processes where resilience abounds. Let’s start building those aspects of ourselves today.

If we can not choose our life circumstances, we can at least work on our thoughts and attitudes. We may be surprised at how much it can change our lives.