The Pain That Emotional Loneliness Means
“You stole my loneliness with a false friendship.” This feeling, this emptiness, may be recognizable. You may have experienced it at some point in your life; when those you thought were your true friends turned out to only share their time for their own gain, and perhaps did not really care so much about your interests, your sorrows, and your joys.
And what happened to the romantic relationships that only faded into failure? Such things happen. We open our hearts to people who we find exciting and interesting only to realize that there is no worse type of loneliness than the one we feel when someone by our side barely notices us and has no idea how he or she she will make us happy .
When someone directs their hopes and desires towards someone else, it creates a kind of emotional loneliness. Few emotions can be as devastating as loneliness that reaches beyond the physical plane.
Many of us are surrounded by people – family, friends, boyfriends and girlfriends and hundreds, maybe thousands of “friends” on all sorts of social media – and yet we feel lonely. There is nothing that hurts as much as feeling the holes, the void that no one knows how to fill.
The loneliness that no one sees
Emotional loneliness is a bit bittersweet. It is very possible that people said to you “ You really have nothing to complain about; you have such a courting boyfriend or girlfriend who loves you too much. “Or” You will never be bored with as many friends as you have. ” and you nod and stick a smile on your face, aware that it’s just a facade, and that the truth is that you really feel lonely.
Most often we believe that loneliness is a purely physical absence of one or more people around us, where we go through life without close friendships and without people who listen to us or allow us to show our daily appreciation to everyone involved. So, is it really necessary to have someone physically by our side? Not at all.
Sometimes loneliness is an intimate area where we can find balance. Self-esteem and being with oneself is a way to strengthen self-esteem.
So we could say that almost all the people who take a step into our lives and only offer their selfishness and emotional immaturity also take away the precious side of the loneliness or balance where we feel protected.
How can one overcome emotional loneliness?
Emotional loneliness is one of the most devastating emotions a person can feel. The feeling of having someone, or maybe several, by our side and still feeling lonely can be the beginning of a depression.
So how do we deal with it?
Identify your concerns, your dissatisfaction or your emptiness.
Sometimes we can mask emotional loneliness with other emotions, such as low self-esteem and / or low motivation to seek social contact, when we actually feel ” there is something beyond myself that is missing “. And the wound stems from the pain of one or more people around us who do not see us or enrich our lives, and really have no idea how to make us happy.
Reflect on and listen to your feelings
What do you feel? Is it sadness, and who makes you feel that way? Do you feel frustrated, and what makes you feel that way? Are you afraid, and if so, who or what are you afraid of?
Once you have identified the basic problem, communicate!
It is very important to share your feelings with others, whether it is with your partner, a family member or a friend. Make it very clear to them that your relationship is causing more harm than good, and that you need to try something new.
Once you have the change in movement, no matter what it may consist of, it is incredibly important that you learn to enjoy your own company again. Why? You have spent so much time not being yourself, expecting things and wanting to have certain specific feelings. You need to balance your needs so that you can find your inner child again and reassure the adult who demands inner peace.
Emotional loneliness is experienced as something incompatible: we have someone, but still feel the pain that loneliness gives until it cuts to the heart. Repairing this, freeing ourselves and finding ourselves again can also help us in our personal development.
