The Different Stages Of “I Love You “

Many times, the greatest romances end with a tearful “I love you”. It is true that these words can mean very different things depending on the stage of the relationship.

It is very likely that the “I love you” we hear for the first time is different from what we hear after a year in the relationship.

Why are there so many meanings behind the words “I love you”?

When two people are in a relationship, they begin to grow together. On our own path of personal growth, we experience all new situations that affect our relationships with other people. Because of this, the meaning of “I love you” can develop over the course of a relationship.

However, there is something that remains unchanged when we use this phrase: the person we say it to. It does not matter how these words are expressed: with tears, laughter, hugs… they still maintain their romance and magic in all relationships.

So what does “I love you” mean in each phase?

Two months: I like how things develop

In a stable, long-term relationship, two months is not very long, and passes very quickly. It is true that we feel most in love at the beginning of a relationship, when we have just discovered the special person we can build a life with. Saying “I love you” within the first two months communicates a feeling that we believe that what we have with this person can last a lifetime. But if we are realistic, we know that nothing lasts forever ; not even a two month long relationship.

It is important to emphasize that many people in this first stage confuse this with how to love someone throughout their life and say “I love you” instead of “I really like you”. This may be due to personal immaturity that comes with youth, or that you do not have enough experience to be in a long-term relationship.

It is recommended to reflect and look inwards before using this very powerful phrase. This way, you will be able to avoid emotional misunderstandings and not harm the person you are really beginning to love.

Five months: you are important

Studies say that this is where we are in the last days of the first phase of love. Saying “I love you” now can mean “You are an important part of my life” and “I want to give you a place in my heart”.

In this phase we feel a little insecure and various doubts and fears can run through our mind: Will he break my heart? Will she feel the same way I do? A time frame of less than six months does not normally give us sufficient clarity for our feelings for anyone. An “I love you” during this phase therefore means that we continue to feel those butterflies in our stomachs, but perhaps not yet in our hearts.

Six months: we are perfect together

During this time, neither person can stop thinking about the other. You love everything that person does and everything that has to do with him. You both express your love in many ways: through photos, letters, gifts, etc…

“I love you” means so much more now than it did three months ago. With these words, you are now sending an implicit message that you love how this person makes you feel, and the best part is that you really feel as if you are becoming a part of his life and that he is becoming a part of yours.

Nine months: that’s our love

There is a saying that goes, “To love someone is like moving to another city.” This is starting to happen now, because the more time that passes in a relationship, the more you become accustomed to developing together on an emotional level. When we say “I love you” during this phase, what we really mean is that what is mine is yours, and what is yours is mine.

From now on, “I love you” is something you both share, just like everything else in your relationship.

Ten months: you’re my best friend

Now is the time when it is completely natural to be with your partner. Being apart is a bit “painful” and feels strange to you. During this phase, “I love you” has much greater weight; it does not matter if you say it after a joke or in text form, because it is still just as meaningful.

It is very likely that if someone asked how you felt, you would not only say that your partner is “the most wonderful person”, but also that he “is my best friend “.

This type of “I love you” goes beyond what your partner can offer you or what you wish he could offer you. That’s when the word “love” really begins to enter the deepest parts of your heart.

One year: you are my world

Surely what you experience in your relationship is pure and unconditional love if you are asked how you feel about your partner and answer with “I can not imagine a life without him / her” . That’s when “I love you”  is much more permanent; This is because you do not question who feels more love and you do not worry about whether the other person feels the same way as you.

You feel more secure and comfortable. Telling your partner that you love him or her makes you relaxed, opens you up and makes you feel complete when you stand next to him or her.

Two years: I think about our future

“I love you” means during this phase “I love who you are and I will love who you become”. It is obvious that this sentence comes after you have experienced the feeling of self-confidence: as long as you two are together, nothing is impossible, and nothing scares you.

Three years: permanence

“I love you” means that you want to make the love you feel for your partner something permanent. You want to share everything with the person you love. You live a life full of affection, security, wisdom and above all mutually learning experiences.

At this stage, this phrase may have been a faster way of saying “You are all I want”. This is what your heart and soul long to say.

Four years: your dreams are alive

One of the most amazing experiences that can happen to a human being is to love and be loved. Love is everything. To feel true love from another person and to reciprocate this love unconditionally is said to be different from everything else.

You are not looking for much more at this stage because you feel that you have reached a form of emotional nirvana. Many people will say how lucky you are and many others will also be jealous. And why not? There are many people who come into the world and still do not know what true love feels like.

This article has described the different phases of relationships as they evolve. It is important to be aware that each partner needs and experiences different things. For example, many people may be stuck in one of these phases for a long time and feel that they need more time or more emotional tools to develop in the relationship.

By Paula Diaz.