Never Adapt To What Does Not Make You Happy
Sometimes we do, we adapt to something that does not make us happy, like someone who puts on a shoe because he thinks it is the right size, but who soon discovers that he can not walk, run or fly… Happiness should do not hurt, and it should not suffocate you, but let you be free, light and let you control your own path. Never adapt if it hurts.
Many years ago, it was a soap company, which marketed its products to work environments, that launched a product on the market with a phrase that succeeded very well. The soap said “Happiness is Busyness”.
Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi takes up the idea that it can bring happiness to concentrate on a task with body and soul. One should also keep in mind if this task means anything to us. Many of the workers had probably looked a little wrong at that advertisement because not everyone was happy with their jobs, so even if it compensated them financially, it did not give them any psychological well-being.
Many of us force ourselves to adapt to daily routines even though we know we will not be happy with them. It’s like wearing the same shoes even though we know we’ll get blisters from them. It’s like being in a carousel that never stops spinning. The world and life continue to happen and we stay in our routine.
We adapt to feel safe
When we were children, our parents used to tie our shoes with a double knot so that they did not dissolve when we fell. They used to stuff us with blankets and pull up the zipper on our jackets so that we would stay warm.
This often made us feel uncomfortable, but we felt safe. As we get older and get more responsibility, that need will feel safe to stay with us. The tendency to look for security remains.
It may seem strange, but the easiest way to solve this need is with our brains. It does not like risk or threat. It whispers to us to “adapt even if you are not happy, because security guarantees your survival”. But we should be aware that adaptation does not always go hand in hand with happiness, because many times no adaptation occurs.
There are people who stay in their relationships even if there is no love, but there is no happiness in the relationship and no trust. For many it is important to escape loneliness and to do this they do not hesitate to adapt to a heart that does not suit their own.
Many people choose to keep their heads down. Many people choose to diminish their skills when writing their resume because they know it is the only way to adapt to the company hierarchy.
As if there was a slogan in our brains, just like for that soap we talked about earlier: “Adapt or die, give up to survive.”
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