Moving Home Again – Is It To Take A Step Back?

Moving away from home is a wonderful moment. The feeling of freedom and independence are a couple of the overwhelming feelings that exist. When we can leave the nest, a whole new world of possibilities, situations and unexplored experiences opens up. Slowly but surely we learn to deal with uncertainties, we learn from our mistakes and we better organize our weeks, months and seasons. But what if we need to move back home?

Our plans and feelings we live out will require more or less strength depending on our age, personality and stage in life. If our freedom comes from studying far from home, the feeling of independence and freedom will become stronger and more important. If it comes from commitments such as work and responsibility to pay the rent, we will value organization and our daily responsibilities.

But if at some point we have become entangled and find ourselves in a situation where we inevitably have to move home to our parents – is it easy to do so? How do we fit into something we have already forgotten?

When you move home again  , the most important thing to keep in mind is the importance of empathy. Especially since this new form of cohabitation can be complicated.

Once you have created your own routines far from the watchful eye of your parents, your way of understanding and relating to the world will change. Moving not only means keeping our needs in mind, but also what makes us feel uncomfortable or guilty. Trying to get into your parents’ seat is necessary  to find the balance in cohabitation.

When we leave the nest, we are not the only ones who change. Our routines and priorities and thoughts change, and so do our parents’. It is important to maintain self-control during a period of adjustment for you and your parents. This will help avoid tension. In addition:

• Make sure you communicate and exchange ideas.
• Understand that you have changed a dynamic that had already become stable.
• Negotiate a schedule and balance expectations. Austerity and structure can be positive. Respect it.
• Remember, it’s your parents and not your roommates.
• Reduce your irritation level (if you have one) by remembering that your family is not responsible for the situation.
• Do not see it only as a “situation”, remember that everyone involved has thoughts, feelings and manners.

• Share moments with the family
• Practice your conflict resolution skills within the family. This will strengthen you in your rebuilding process. ‘

When a child comes home after living alone, they return as someone who has adapted to their own routines and their own distinct form of seeing the world, which may be different from the one they had as a child. There are fundamental differences (such as financial), but it is also necessary to adapt psychologically.

While it is natural to help a child or family member, there are details that you should keep in mind. Think about them as soon as you find out that someone will move in with you. The clearer the priorities, the better the new cohabitation situation will work.

• Remember that the child role is different for each person.
• Negotiate and establish chores and norms for cohabitation.
• Communicate clearly with your child or family member. The fact that e has experienced some tough times does not have to mean that you have to be overprotective for any longer period.
• A few days after they have moved in, plan for the future and clarify how all parties think about this transition phase.
• Do not ignore your own needs and routines
• Do not talk only about the period of independence or personal crisis. Create moments for psychological rest.
• Reduce explosive expressions of emotion.

As we can see  , moving home is a process of support and understanding of all parties involved. Communication, understanding and tenderness will avoid doing something that is already complex even more difficult.