Love For Introverted People

The brains of introverted people work in a different way. This is why love for introverts tends to be more fragile, with far fewer words, but with very sincere and deep “I love you”. They are personalities capable of connecting with their loved ones in a much more intense, almost magical way.

Without fear of being wrong, we can say that an introverted personality is much better understood in today’s society. Thanks to a long line of studies and published books on the subject, such as Silence – The Importance of Introverts in a Society where Everyone is Heard and Seen by Susan Cain, we already know important facts such as that introverts are not shy, that they are selective, observant, sensitive and even good leaders in work environments.

With that said, in connection with love, it is common for introverted people to face difficulties in connection with this part of their personality. Adolescence can lead them to believe that they have no chance against the blinding sparks of extroverts. For a time, they lived in the quiet corners of the back row, where they could see the world calmly and discreetly.

Love for introverted teens tends to be discreet. They do not dare to take a step into a context that to the naked eye seems suitable for the brave, for the lovers of noise and the groups of countless friends where everyone speaks and no one listens.

But little by little, the introverts can “wake up” and realize all the things that speak for them…

It is said that simplicity consists of pushing the obvious aside and keeping it meaningful. This view, this focus, is what undoubtedly characterizes introverts. They do not like tricks, talking for the sake of talking or attracting attention. They do not want to spend time and energy on things that go against their genuine essence, their soul, their personality.

Love for introverts can therefore be a bit more complicated. They have a harder time taking the step to flirt, go to parties to socialize or start conversations with the person they are attracted to if they are in a larger group of people. We must not forget that introverts suffer from higher neuronal fatigue when it comes to communicating and socializing. As such, they need longer periods of solitude to “recharge their batteries”.

Carl Gustav Jung also tackled the problem of introversion with great interest. For him , introverted people focused all their attention on the core of subjective and psychological processes. They tend to distance themselves from the whispers of daily life in order to breathe the necessary oxygen which is loneliness.

With that said and these traits in mind… how can they ever find a partner?

Today, there is a process that has been set in motion called “Silent Revolution”. This focus works towards different purposes. On the one hand, to break down false perceptions: introversion and extroversion are not static categories. They are two extremes in a continuum where people tend to lean in different directions to different degrees.

The introverts do not hate to socialize, nor do they lack social skills. On the contrary , we are talking about someone who has conquered his own freedom. In a hyperactive society that forces us to depend on outside sources for the amount of information made available to us, the introverts have found a refuge in themselves to be more creative, sensitive, original, analytical and better at dealing with their emotions.

Sometimes there is no need to go to a party to find a partner. People with this personality profile know in which contexts they can enter and how to create bonds with others. They are seducers at short distances, masters of face-to-face conversations, of moments cast in simplicity and magical intimacy.

Another myth associated with love for introverts is that they only become good partners for people with the same personality as themselves. This is not the case. Introverts and extroverts are excellent couples by enriching each other.

Now let’s take a look at the features that tend to define them:

• Introverted people enjoy sharing lonely moments with their partner. They focus all their energy and attention on that person. They are also fantastic architects when it comes to connecting with our deepest feelings and building a stable and genuine compromise.

• On the other hand, and this is important, people with the introverted personality know how to give space to their love. They do this because even they need lonely moments to process their surroundings and enjoy themselves.
• Something we must also understand is that we must never force introverts to be or do something that does not suit them. They are resilient when it comes to changing their habits or going against their values, essences or customs. They do not understand tricks and will not “socialize more” just because a partner asks for it.
• Being quiet does not mean that they are “thinking something bad”. This is a very common belief. Having an introverted partner sometimes means a lot of silence. When they act in this way, it does not mean that they are bored, that they do not know what to say or that they are uncomfortable.

We must not bombard them with the classic question: “What are you thinking about?”

Because if there is one thing that introverts appreciate, it is sharing these quiet moments with someone. It is permission to be oneself without pressure, it is to rejoice in genuine simplicity, to weave together one’s own inner world with one’s beloved in a simple intimacy.

Can there be anything better?

Photos by Eveline Tarunadjaja.