The Extraordinary Moments We Share
Many of our most extraordinary moments in life are the ones we share. These are pieces of magical connection with fantastic people. Whether they are friends, family members, summer flirts or the love of your life. They were, they are and they will be happy moments that you appreciate and that give you strength in difficult times.
If you had photographs of every moment in life, chances are that some scenes would have a special sheen. These are moments of joy, prosperity and subtle balance.
The moments when everything in life suddenly became harmonious. Instead of complaining that these perfect moments do not happen more often, you should be thankful that you got to experience them.
In 1990, Martin Seligman switched from studying depression or learned defenselessness to studying happiness. Since then, authors have written thousands of books on how to “be happy.” They tell us how we can become writers of these extraordinary moments.
They explain how to make smart decisions and become architects of happiness, self-assurance and self-confidence. Working with these aspects of our lives means that our daily lives will be more in line with our personal needs.
Seligman’s positive psychology has received much criticism. Well-known psychiatrists and social psychologists, such as Jerome Wakefiled from New York University, actually believe that today’s society is obsessed with “being happy.” So obsessed that we have simply forgotten how to tolerate or deal with grief and enjoy extraordinary moments.
We forget that moments actually constitute happiness. These are precious pieces of time that come and go like shiny soap bubbles that burst and disappear… But they leave us with smiles on our lips and a reminder of the magic we felt as children.
Close your eyes for a moment. Ask your memory to transport you to a happy time. In a little over a second you are there. Maybe you did something naughty with your classmates, or you played in the pool with your siblings. The smell of chlorine and freshly cut grass…
Maybe you see yourself with your grandparents, walking hand in hand and listening to their stories after school. These extraordinary moments are so precious.
Your mind is predisposed to childhood memories. But your happy moments can also be holding hands under the table or waking up next to your partner. And of course the memorable trip with your friends.
These shared, extraordinary moments connect you with a thread of feeling, mutual understanding and affection. They are unique jewels in our most intimate thoughts and personal history. They are a “life lived” – they are pieces of history that fulfill us.
Colleagues call Sonia Lyubormirsky “the professor of happiness”, even though her real title is professor of psychology at the University of California. She explains that happiness requires hard work and effort. But if you invest time and effort into it, you will notice that it can be quite fun.
Why? One way to achieve happiness is to learn to connect with others. Having friends and significant relationships is a great way to promote more frequent “magical” moments. Sometimes coffee with someone you like can be cleansing and happy.
We need to look beyond what the clichés say about happiness. “It’s just around the corner” or “happiness comes when you least expect it”. People own these things all the time, but we need to be clear about something.
A good attitude and self-confidence are the key to enjoying life. You have to be open to new things. If you are not, it will be harder for you to enjoy life. You will encounter many closed doors if you do not develop the ability to connect and observe.
Use the right filter in your daily life, and you will be able to create extraordinary moments. As a consequence, you will enjoy life more.
The first strategy is to know how to focus on things that matter. Remember who and what is important to your heart. As a result, you will be able to invest time, effort and energy into these special aspects of life.
The second step is generosity. Beautiful moments are often born when you do something for someone else or when someone does something for you. This happens because you share things from the heart. You feel true affection for the other person. These moments are free from selfishness and hidden agendas.
The third strategy is linked to our ability to be in the present. How well do you live in the present? Because it is very important that you understand this – happiness is not scheduled. Do not postpone the happiness you could feel today until tomorrow.
The last strategy is linked to gratitude. You must understand that happiness comes and goes, just as we said at the beginning. These magical moments will not last forever. As long as you can enjoy them, you should also express gratitude. Say thank you to all the special people around you.
Appreciate that you can enjoy experiences that help you grow as a person. As a result, you can give the best of yourself and feel worthy of these positive emotions.
Do not hesitate to promote these extraordinary moments whenever you can.
